"The Al Brutality Hour"

I know that my hubby will probably be squirming when he reads the title of this post. He often asks me why I am writing about him. He is not the type of guy who wants to be in the lime light, so to speak. Well, my answer to that is, stop inspiring me then! My life would be pretty dull if I did not have all the insanity and chaos created by him and others around me. Sometimes it drives me mad, but I wouldn't have it any other way. So on with my post.......

I know I have said this before. Al's phone rings off the hook and it drives me nuts. We can not even sit down for supper, without someone calling him and wanting something. I swear that thing rings every 10 minutes. Sometimes, he is literally running in circles. I don't know how he does it. My head would, and often does, spin around, like in the "exorcist". :o) So one day last week, he came in to eat. He was in a hurry, because he had a lot of things to get done. I told him that tonight he could spend at least another half an hour with his family. EVERYONE else could wait. Tanner agreed and it was on. Tanner said something like "yeah dad, this is you", and he proceeded to do a perfect imitation of Al. I laughed so hard, and then, of course, I joined in. This continued for the next 45 minutes or so, with Al trying his best to deter us. I do not know why, but he did not think it was fair that we were making him spend "quality time" with us, only to be the object of our amusement. Even Colter laughed a little. (We like to recruit them while they are young.) Al was a good sport about it.

Tanner and I dubbed this "The Al Brutality Hour". We are thinking about making this a weekly ritual. May be we can start a cult and get a small following. What the heck, a big one would be okay too. I will get to work immediately on the applications and the requirements needed to join. There will be a small fee, to cover the cost of the shrink that Al will be needing in the future! Stay tuned for further details.....

Have a wacky Wednesday!

Daily quiz fun

I thought it would be fun to start a daily trivia tournament. There is a link on the right hand side below my family's picture. Every day, there will be a new quiz containing general questions. There are 10 questions on each daily quiz. You are scored on the number of correct answers and the time it takes to answer all the questions. Score is kept daily and monthly. Anyone and everyone is welcome to play. Good luck and have fun!

Sunday fun

Where did the weekend go? Time is flying by to quickly these days. All though I had a three day weekend, it only seemed like one. It was great anyway. I had a play date with my "bestest" friend, Paula, on Sunday. We terrorized the unsuspecting shoppers in Sioux Falls and the poor staff and diners at Applebee's. No more Rio Rancho Sirloin folks. I am boycotting this eatery! I am sure the fine folks that work there are probably thrilled about that. Paula and I have perfected our stealth mode attack, so they can no longer lock the doors when they see us coming. I am also little disappointed that we did not get to see the big red high heel by the shoe carnival. That would have been way too much fun. We had some good laughs and I am always so happy and grateful when I get to see her.

I didn't think it had been that long since I saw Paula last, but the last time I saw her, I couldn't even really tell she was pregnant. This time you definitely could. Her next little terrorist is due to arrive in just over a month. She was hiding him well.

Other than my fun day with the "Drama Sissy Momma", (Paula's current nickname) my weekend was pretty non eventful. It was much more quite than usual. Colter and I had the house to our selves for the most part. Al was working and Tanner had a birthday party/sleep over at Wesley's. Perhaps that is why it seemed to fly by. Because I had some degree of piece. I guess too much of a good thing would be a waste. Either that, or I am being punished. That is doubtful. I am always such a good girl. (wink! wink!)

Have a terrific Tuesday!

Baby fat

This picture was taken almost 5 years ago at my brother's wedding. Can you believe I thought that I was fat here? I am such an idiot. I would give anything to look like that now. About two months ago, I had some really stupid guy say to me, "You haven't had that kid yet?" Um, yeah. like 4 months ago. Instead of handing me the bullet, why didn't you just pull the trigger. And by the way, thanks for writing my suicide note, jacka**. That got me even more motivated to get rid of this extra baggage. I know that it takes time, and I am happy with the slow progress I am making. I know that eventually I will get there. I am just SO sick of wearing the same old ugly fat girl clothes and I cannot bring myself to spend money on some decent ones until I get close to my pre-pregnancy weight. All together I have lost 41lbs, but I still have 24 to go. My ultimate goal is an extra 10-15, but I will be happy if I could just be what I was before I got pregnant, and I swear I will never complain about being fat again!! Hopefully, by Colter's first birthday, this hideous beast will be no more. And girls, when that times come, we are going to do some major pampering. Until then, "ROAR!"

Everyone have a fantastic weekend! And guys, think before you speak!

I got skills

I obviously would never be hired to work in the sears photography department. For whatever reason, I have the hardest time getting that great picture of Colter. Sure, I do get some cute ones, but you don't know how many bad ones I took to get that one good one! I plan on getting Colters pictures done professionally very soon. Al thought I should just do it myself. I should be flattered that he thinks I could do such a good job, but I really think he just doesn't want me to spend a lot of money! Today I thought I would show you some of my MAD SKILLS, as Tanner would say.

The following pictures were all taken at supper time. I was trying to catch the mess on Colter's face. He was grinning from ear to ear, as if to say, "Just for you Mom!"

There was a smile, behind those hands.

AAAAAHHHHHHH!

Huh? You talkin' to me?-- Obviously his fathers son! :0)

No more pictures!

Need sleepy

Uuuggghhh! I am going out of my mind and looking for suggestions. I am in need of some good sleep. I know it is normal to be sleep deprived when you are a new mom, but this is extreme. There is no reason why I shouldn't be able to catch some halfway decent zzzzzzzzz's. I work nights, Colter goes to daycare during the day so I can sleep, and he goes to bed around 7:30 at night, allowing me more than enough time for a good nap before work. When I get home from work, I get on my treadmill and am usually in bed by 9:30. I can usually fall asleep right away, but I am back up by noon or 1pm. During this time, I toss and turn like mad. I feel like I am tossing at least every 10 minutes. Every time I move, the dogs think I am going to get up, so they start getting excited. After trying to go back to sleep for 1/2 hour or so, I finally give up and get up. After Colter goes to bed, it is more of the same. I could kick the dogs out of the bedroom, but our big dog would just bark at the wind, and my little one would constantly be scratching at the door. She has to be attached to my hip at all times. Besides, it is not their fault that I toss and turn constantly.

I have been buying new pillow after new pillow thinking it would solve the problem. I recently invested in a very expensive pillow, and it is very comfy. It has not put an end to my sleepless days, so I have finally excepted the fact that it is my mattress. I have been debating on what to buy. Do I buy a new mattress or invest in a memory foam pad. I really do not want to spend the money for a decent mattress, because I know it will be spendy. The only bed that I have found that I love, cost $5000, and I wouldn't spend that unless I was a billionaire! Do any of you have a memory foam pad, and what do you think of it? Do you have a mattress that you love that doesn't break the bank? I am begging for suggestions here!

Colter's 6 month Checkup

Yesterday Colter had his 6 month check up. He is 27 1/2 inches and 19lbs 8oz. I was sure he was going to be over 20lbs, as was my back, but I guess we were both wrong. Colter is healthy and is doing well meeting the milestones, however, he still hates tummy time, and is lacking in that department. His Pediatrician said he did have good strength in his arms, and recommended that I move the mattress in his crib all the way down. He seems to think that since Colter likes to stand so much, he will probably be pulling himself up soon. Some days, I thinks so. Others, not so much. As soon as I got home, I lowered that mattress all the way. That is going to take some getting used to, but I know it is a wise choice.

The Ped also gave me the green light to start feeding him #2 foods. So I decided to hit Walmart to get some. Now that was something! I never knew there were so many choices. I am sure our local grocery store does not carry that many choices. Any way, I didn't know what to get, so I just decided to get a couple of each, and more of the things I knew he all ready liked. My cart was filling up fast, so I decided I better stop. I think I had 25 different kinds of food in my cart and I probably only grabbed half of the different choices available. Colter will definitely not get bored with eating the same foods. I just hope he likes all of them!!! I also hope I do not make his head spin. Yikes!

When we arrived at Walmart, there was a lady with her kids walking in behind me. I grabbed my cart and pushed it to a spot out of the way and then got Colter all propped up in the kiddy seat. This lady almost broke her neck as she walked by us. She was grinning from ear to ear at us. I just thought she thought my little man was a "Handsome little devil" like his shirt said. After some browsing, I finally headed to get the baby food. While I was standing there looking, here comes that same woman, once again grinning. I started thinking stalker? Kidnapper? Drugs? May be my crack is showing. Do I have a large piece of cheese stuck in my teeth? Is it my mushroom shaped new mommy body? What?!! Finally, she spoke. She says "So cute!" I think to myself, "yes, I know we are. Would you like our autographs?" The woman then says, "Where did you get that blanket? Did someone make it for you?" Ego check! I guess she isn't talking about us, she is talking about the checkered flag blanket I made for Colter. She must be on drugs. How could she think the blanket was cuter than us? Like the nice person I am, I told her where I found the material, etc. She was grateful and went on her way. She did not stalk me any further. I did not have to use my Kungfu moves on her.

Have a terrific Tuesday!

Rub-a-dub-dub, Colter's in the tub

Meet Calgon, also known as "Tubby the tub." He is a dear friend to Colter and I. Colter loves to play in him, and I love to play with the crabby free baby! When baby pouts, I bring him out, and Calgon takes us both away. Calgon is one of my top tools in my secret arsenal. Can you believe he actually cleans messy babies too? I love those two for one deals.

Colter has always loved bath time. Knock on wood, he has never once fussed during bath time. Not even when I wash his hair. I hope that is a sign of things to come, like good hygiene and no arguing when its shower time. Hey, I can dream. He can be super crabby and when I get him naked, he stops. I imagine all babies love being naked. I wouldn't like to be in those stuffy diapers all day. When he is naked and I pick him up, he grins real big. I am sure he knows that means that we are going to visit Tubby. The only bad part is, if he is really crabby, once I take him out, he has not forgot, and he goes back to crabby baby very soon after. Relief does come for mom shortly there after, because Calgon also makes Colter a very relaxed, sleepy baby. Aahhh! Once again Calgon has taken me away! Oh, how I love you Calgon!

Now that Colter can semi sit, he is enjoying bath time even more. I enjoy the fact that when he decides to use his water gun, I don't have to dodge from the bullets. He still needs mom to keep a hand on him to make sure he doesn't fall over, but playing with those rubber duckies is just so much fun. When I lay him back to wash his hair, he tries his best to get back up. The look on his face is classic. It always makes me laugh.

Tonight, he had me rolling with laughter. He picked up that rubber ducky and put the butt end in his mouth and let go. He had it in there for a good 30 seconds and he was looking all around. It was hilarious. I am not sure if he was trying to be goofy, but he sure was! He is such a Ham!

I am looking forward to the "nice weather" that is being forecasted for this weekend. I am not sure if it will be nice enough to take Colter for a walk, but I can't wait to be able to do that. I am certainly looking forward to being able to at least walk around the yard with him.

I hope you all have a super weekend and get to enjoy the beautiful weather!

The Junk Man

One thing I really enjoy is my yard. Every year, I try to add something new. A new flower bed, new bush or tree, etc. When it comes to buying things for myself, it is a very hard thing for me to do. I usually only buy things for myself at tax time, but even then I usually feel guilty. However, when the seasons change, I usually splurge on flowers and yard things. But even then, I usually don't splurge until everything is going on sale. I guess you could say my yard is my one guilty pleasure. This is why it drives me nuts when Al drags home junk all the time.

I often tease Al about being a hillbilly. I am not sure if the right word would be hillbilly, redneck or something else. He always manages to find something cheap that looks like junk. He is always so excited about his new find. He will get it fixed up right away, play with it for a while, then he will sell it and find some more junk. I am positive if it were up to him, we would live in an actual junkyard. I must admit, that I secretly enjoy his junk too, because it often results in fun for the whole family. Yes, it can be embarrassing pulling up to the dock to unload a spray painted jet ski, with 100 mile an hour duck tape, into the water from the back of an S-10 pickup, that also looks like it could use some spray paint. Especially when there are people waiting there with there big fancy boats. But we definitely know how to laugh at ourselves, and we usually have a blast with our crap! And then we can laugh some more, because we don't have to make payments, and when it breaks down, it is not a huge loss.

In my mind, I pretend we are living in paradise, with a gigantic house, fast cars, great toys, etc. Then I look out my window and see this......

I am immediately jolted back to reality! Yowza! I realize I do not live in paradise. Sigh. But I also realize that it could be worse, this thing could be sitting in my yard. If you'll notice on the top there is an indentation in the snow. That is a make shift sun roof, with no glass, that looks like it was cut with a sawsall. Al's junk looks like gold compared to this. And now I realize that I need to make my privacy fence go the whole distance of the yard.

I often wish for a fancy house, and may be to win the lottery, but when I really think about it, I have all ready won. I have a roof over my head, a talented husband, a funny stepson and a healthy baby boy. My brother and his family live near by, I do not have in-laws from hell, and I have some great friends. Yes, I would like to have a bigger house someday, but what good is it if you don't have the important things in your life?

So if you ever see us out playing with our hillbilly junk, come and join us. Being toothless is not a requirement.

Happy Thursday Ya'll!

Bye, Bye money

How many of you actually write something on the little memo line on your checks? I usually don't, but sometimes I get an uncontrollable urge to write something off the wall on that line. I wonder if the people who receive my checks ever see that and think....what the? Sometimes, I use that line to take a jab if I was treated rudely or had poor service, etc. For instance, "rotten steak." For whatever reason, I have never been one to send back food, demand better things or yell. I have always much rather take those little jabs, it is much more fun. I know that this is not what this line was intended for, but it certainly makes saying goodbye to your money a bit more exciting!

Recently, we received our income tax return. It was a nice amount, that I wish I could have spent on something for myself and my family, but we decided it would be wise to pay off our Dr bills that were racked up this past year. I was so excited to pay them, that I took them with me to work right away, so I could drop them in the mail the next morning. (a little sarcasm here.)
When I got to about the 10th one, I was starting to get delirious. I mean, I have never wrote out so many checks, for those large amounts in one day. This was crazy! I finally pulled out the last Dr bill, and it was one from an incident that had made me insanely mad. Long story short, Al had gone to the emergency room for these dizzy spells he was having, and the Dr on call told him he was hyperventilating. He obviously was not. She told him to buy some brown paper bags to breath into. What?! Your not even going to give him a bag?! He came up here and had to pay you to tell him to go to the store and buy a brown paper bag?! Multiple cuss words had come from my mouth!

So as I wrote out this check, I was over come by the urge to right something on the little memo line. "Not even a paper bag!" I am sure that made someone wonder if I was smoking something. It may be the fact that I was so crazed from writing out these checks, but I laughed and laughed and laughed. All by my lonesome. Just me, the TV people, the www., and my checkbook. Nobody else.

All right. That is enough crazy talk for today! ;)

Handbook for male excuses?

A fellow blogger had wrote something on her blog about something funny her kid had said. It reminded me of some of the funny excuses Tanner has come up with over the years. I had almost forgot about it until today when Tanners pal Wesley came over to play. I will get to that in a minute, but first I wanted to list a couple of my all time favorite Tanner excuses that cracked me up!

Me: Tanner! How many times do I have to tell you not to cover up the heat vents with your hot wheels?

Tanner: I didn't do it. Sadie did. (Sadie being our dog.)

Me: Wow! She is pretty talented. Look how she got them all in a perfectly straight line! (Thinking to myself, we could get rich off of this dog! lol)
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Me: Tanner! Quit that! (as he is rough housing with Sadie. Suddenly, he slams into my vacuum and knocks it over, breaking the latch that keeps in in the upright position.) Now look what you did! Why do you think I told you to quit?

Tanner: Sadie pushed me.
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Me: Tanner! What did I tell you about having all the lights on in the house?

Tanner: I didn't turn them on, Sadie did. (Okay, this kid really needs a sibling.)
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While we are on the subject of excuses, here are some of my favorite that have come out of Al's mouth. Two of my favorites were excuses he gave for when he wrecked the race car.

Excuse one: The sun was in my eyes.
Excuse two: My glove got stuck in the steering wheel.
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Tanner: Who ate the rest of my sub that was in the fridge?

Al: Sadie did. (Man, I really need to get this dog on Letterman!)
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All right. Now for the reason I remembered all of this today. Hopefully you won't find this offensive. It is just my sense of humour and it was not meant in a mean way.

Me: Hi Wesley. I am glad to see you came over today. Did you walk today? Tanner said you never come over because you don't want to walk.

Wesley: No. My mom gave me a ride.

Tanner: He doesn't walk because of this. (pointing to a scar on Wesley's forehead.)

Me: How did that happen?

Wesley: I hit it one time when I was in the gym, that is why I don't walk.

Me: So, what? Did you get brain damage or something and you don't know how to cross the street? (I know, but it was the first thing that came out of my mouth.)

Wesley: No. My Dr. said that it will get sensitive when it is cold out.

Me: Well, if that is what your Dr says, then I guess you should run with it. So what are you guys going to do? Play games? (meaning ps2.)

Tanner: No, we are going to play on the snow pile.

Me: (to Wesley) Make sure you put on your stocking cap. I wouldn't want your scar causing you problems.

Wesley: I will. (I am almost rolling on the ground in laughter at this point.)
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Okay, so I hope that didn't offend you. I didn't think it was funny that he had gotten hurt. I found it funny because he doesn't walk because it is cold, however he can play outside and it doesn't bother it. He wasn't even wearing a hat. You know how kids can be. Or, should I say men. It seems that every guy I know has an excuse for everything. No offense guys, but you sure can come up with some doozies! There must be a machine that they hook the boys up to when they are born, that automatically files an excuse log in their brain. Mmmmmm, I think I am going to have to do some detective work! Wish me luck!

Colter is 6 months old!

It is so hard for me to believe, but my baby was 6 months old yesterday! He is growing so fast. I don't know exactly how much he weighs now, but I am sure it is over 20 lbs. He is also very long. He will have his 6 month check up and shots next Monday, so I will let you know his official stats then.

In the past week, he has found his screaming voice. Cute now, probably annoying later! He is also starting to sit up better, but still needs the boppy so he when he does fall, he doesn't whack his little head. Yesterday, I figured that out. I thought I could sit him there while I grabbed the boppy, but he decided not and fell to the side. Thankfully it was not a very hard fall. Still, mommy felt really bad. He has also started to scooch down when sitting on the couch, so I really have to keep an eye on him. He loves, loves, loves to stand. It amazes me how one day he wanted nothing to do with his legs, and then the next all he wanted to do was stand.

Colter is also starting to get that darn separation anxiety. So far, he has been okay with me leaving him with the babysitter. But when we are at home or anywhere else, he has to know where mommy is at all times. He has decided anyone else, besides mom, dad, brother and babysitter, needs to give him a little time to feel comfortable before he is okay with going to them. Colter would much rather be with mom than anyone else, including dad. He is a mommas boy all the way. Hopefully he stays that way, then may be I can convince Al that he needs a daddy's girl. ;)

Have a terrific Tuesday!

Update on baby Katie

I just wanted to let you all know that Katie had her surgery last Thursday and is doing very well. I know the next big thing was trying to get her to eat. She has been on an iv since she was born, so she has not actually ate anything yet. Her mom has been pumping and has plenty of milk saved up. They are hoping she will do well, because she was making the sucking motions last week. No word on when they will be able to come home, but hopefully it will be soon!

Snow blower racing?

This is what I saw when I got back from dropping off Colter at daycare!

Snow, snow, snow

Remember when you were a kid and it seemed like we always had blizzards and snow all winter long? All winter, we would play on the huge snow piles left by the plows. Dig tunnels through them, make forts out of them. When the plows would go by and they would create those perfect snow boulders to make a fort in the yard. There was always snow for sledding. If you built a snowman it would last a really long time. What ever happened to those days? Our kids don't even really know what a real winter is suppose to be like. Don't get me wrong, I love the mild winters, but I still get excited when we have a blizzard. I am sure we have had one since the 1996-97 winter, but I really can not remember any.

The only thing that is a bummer, is I don't get to have a snow day like the kids, or some of the business' in town. I don't think my boss or co-workers would believe me if I said I couldn't make it two blocks to work. I actually thought about calling work and saying I couldn't make it just for a joke, but I am not sure it would have been found to be very funny.

Any how, I tried to get a few pictures of the drifts out my back door yesterday afternoon. The pictures really do not do any justice, but you get the idea. Most of you all ready know what it is like here, because you live here!! I really should have taken the pictures last night when I left for work, because it was really drifting then. I am sure when I get out of here it will be a lot worse. I have heard some of the city guys talking and they have some roads they can't get open yet. I just talked to the county, and they informed me they did not plan on going out at least until it is light, but most likely later than that. The state boys all ready announced they are not going out!

My pond is under there somewhere.

Notice the huge snow pile in the alley. It is only going to get bigger and when it all thaws out, it will make a super nice mess! This picture really cracks me up. Do you see the van seat covered with snow? Yep! Al got a new minivan and he had to take the seat out so he could hall around his toys. Hillbillies? I guess so!

This past weekend when we got the snow, I decided to go out and scoop the front and back walk, and around the side of the house. We have a snow blower, but Al does not want to show me how to use it because I might break it! Um, I doubt it, but if that's what you have to tell yourself buddy. I wouldn't want you to think you were any less manly. Any way, he has probably only scooped the front once all winter, so I decided to get out there so the poor mailman wouldn't have to tromp through all the snow. The new shovel we bought is a real piece of junk, but I did my best. When I was done, I had no more than walked in the door, when I saw Al pull up. He didn't come in, and after a few minutes I looked out to see if he had left again. Low and behold, he was getting the snow blower out of the garage. He went over everything I had just got done scooping. When he came in, I said "I just got done scooping that." He says "Why did you do that? I planned on doing it when I got back." Um, okay, you have not scooped it all winter, why would you do it now? He just laughed at me. He is a super nice guy!!!

Stay safe today! Have a great weekend!