Flea Bag

The following is a short story, based on a true story. Written by me, starring my redneck brother Scott. I hope that once you finish my short story, you will feel just a wee bit smarter. This is redneck edjamakashon at its finest.

flea /fli/ –noun
1.any of numerous small, wingless bloodsucking insects of the order Siphonaptera, parasitic upon mammals and birds and noted for their ability to leap.

bag /bæg/ –noun
1.a container or receptacle of leather, plastic, cloth, paper, etc., capable of being closed at the mouth; pouch.

A few years ago, my brother Scott had gotten a new little puppy. It was very early spring, and it was still chilly out. He had called me up, wanting my expertise, because he knows no one smarter than me. :o)

You see, we had this thing in our home. It was a nad biting dingle berry muncher that went by the name of Chevy. It was what most of you know as a dog, a miniature schnauzer if you want to get technical. He did resemble what most may consider a ankle biter, but he truly was a nad biter. Chevy, was a nasty little thing, and not liked by many, including this huge animal lover.

My brother knew that I was an expert in the fleadom fighting field. Chevy was the king of flea's and I was his fleadom fighting jester. He took great joy in watching me juggle with his fleas.

My brother, Scott, was seeking knowledge about what fleas looked like because he thought perhaps his new puppy had some. I was almost certain that it was to early in the year for flea's and told him so.

A few days later, I found out that his little puppy did indeed have those nasty little bugs on it. Apparently, my redneck brother wanted to investigate the matter further, so he picked off a few of the bugs with a tweezers. He then put the bugs in a baggie and took them to work the next day to show them to the guys. One of his co-workers confirmed his suspicions that they were indeed fleas. I am still not sure why they have not locked my brother up in a padded cell somewhere.

My brother, with fleas in a baggie, now that is what you call a redneck flea bag folks!